After a terrible day yesterday - one of those days that just wouldn't ever end and then when it did it ended with a goose egg, (I was right in front of her and she tripped over her feet ---one of those moments you wish you could have seen in advance and prevented...and then feel horrible for not being able too...ugh. Just a wretched day.)
So I decided today we were going to be out of the house.
We spent a lovely morning at church - I enjoyed teaching the Sunday School kids - we had a great morning learning about encouragement! :)
After church we headed out to the farm. I was hoping the kids would nap on the way there, which they did a bit, but when they did wake up, they did a fairly good job of being content the rest of the way...A still is definitely not a great traveler...but hopefully that will come with time!
We really had a wonderful time at the farm. It was on and off rainy, but walking around the barn, walking around outside and playing inside - we had a great time. We found out A loves tractors! Who knew! She pointed at them, and kept wanting to climb into them. Of course Poppers loved that and indulged! I think A had a ride in every tractor on the farm! She and Micah both had like a twenty minute ride around the farm. It was great! :)
But the biggest blessing of the day came when Micah was inside reading stories with Grannie and A was riding on the tractor with Poppers and I happened to find myself alone looking up at a crazy sky. The sky was changing between crazy rain clouds and blue sky with white clouds and sun. I stopped for a minute and had an interesting realization. Over the past year, every time we were at the farm and I was alone, I was depressed. I felt as though I was very unneeded. When there are 6 adults and one child....the person the child is with most, is the one that he doesn't need when there are other people around...I always felt very depressed and that I should be enjoying this time or looking after my daughter...still being busy. But today, when I was standing outside gazing at the constantly changing crazy sky, I didn't feel depressed because I was alone. I felt joy. I felt contentment. I felt peace. I felt full. I enjoyed the few moments of peace. I was thankful for the few moments of peace. It was such a different feeling than I've had before. I couldn't do anything but praise God for this new feeling...and thank Him for all He has done and for strength to continue.
I am thankful for a wonderful day, and I am thankful that God is changing my heart. He is working miracles everyday.
For great is your love, higher than the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the skies.
~Psalm 108:4~
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