Adoption 101

Sometimes in the midst of life's craziness, something grabs ahold of your attention. Something that you can't just push away, because it comes back over and over again. Everywhere you look, think, or feel - this theme is reoccuring.

That's what it was like for us and the decision to adopt.

When I was a child I drew a picture of what my family would look like. Naturally, there were multiple kids, however, one child in that picture was an adopted child from China. Back then my scope was rather narrow as to where adopted children could come from, but nevertheless, it has been on my mind then.
I can't speak too much for my husband, but I know he's always been sensitive to adoption as well. His sister always pretend-played about orphans, so it was on her mind and therefore his mind at a young age as well.

Somehow, in His infinite wisdom, God saw fit to put us together to where we are today. I am so blessed to have a husband who has the same mind as I. God brought us together with all our differences, but in this he has intertwined our hearts together towards this passion.

Fast forward to now. When we miscarried with Jaimie and then were pregnant with Kalyna, Albert and I had decided that we would have our two children and then look into adoption to grow our family. I'm not a huge fan of being pregnant, but I love kids and have always wanted to have a family of at least 4. And Albert was a big advocat that there are so many children out there who need good homes. So we were open to the idea. Then all of a sudden everywhere we looked, adoption was the topic. There was a guest speaker at church one weekend and he shared about orphans all over the world - I was definitely ready after that to go to Russia and adopt all the little girls. I would turn on the radio - and the topic was adoption - a family who grew to some crazy number because she first had her 4 or 5 boys and then they started to foster, and ended up adopting many of the kids they fostered. A friend had just finished the adoption process. Our church all of a sudden had an orphan care ministry. And those signs just kept coming.

When Kalyna passed away, I really felt like she was strongly saying, "I am safe. I am loved. I am happy, healthy, no pain, sorrow or sickness will ever touch me. Now go help those who have to go through those things on earth. Walk with them and ease their pain." I know that sounds weird, but I guess I needed her approval to have more children? They will never take her place, but they will become a part of our forever family.

So I made our first call regarding this whole adoption process in August of 2012.
Since then, we had our Orientation meeting at the end of October 2012.
Our initial home visit at the end of November 2012.
We filled out all our initial paperwork and such and were enrolled in the PRIDE training - adoption/fostering course.
PRIDE stands for: Pre-service Training For Prospective Resource Families
(a foster family is also known as a resource family)
We began our PRIDE couse this past Wednesday, so our Pride training goes for 9 sessions - and will take us to the beginning of March 2013.
After our training, we will complete our homestudy - all of our Pride training homework and evaluations will go into our homestudy as well as a couple more home visits and lots of answering questions and such. Then hopefully we will be approved as foster/adoptive parents. Looking forward to that day.

PRIDE will surely be an invaluable course. I think it will even help us in our daily parenting with Micah. I'm really looking forward to gaining so much knowledge in these next 2 months. It's intense and intimidating, but you can tell for sure, that their main purpose is to make sure that everyone is there for the right reasons - want to help kids - and then giving families the tools they need to ensure that placement of children is a sucessful and positive experience for all involved.
At the end of these 9 sessions we are expected to be able to demonstrate a knowledge of and the ability to be able to do these six competencies:
1. Protecting and nurturing children and youth
2. Meeting developmental needs and addressing developmental delays
3. Supporting relationships between children, youth and their families
4. Connecting children and youth to safe, nurturing relationships intended to last a lifetime
5. Participating as a member of the child or youth's professional team
6. Positively reinforcing a child or youth's heritage and cultural identity
It's a lot, but it will be totally worth it, and hopefully will give us the tools to be good parents to the children who are intrusted into our family. We so look forward to meeting those beautiful children.

Well, that's our journey to adoption so far in a nutshell. We are looking forward to see what God has instore for us this year. A verse I read this morning is what I will leave you with:

In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.
~Proverbs 16:9~

6 months

Wow! Cannot believe it's been 6 months since my little girl was born. She'll be dancing in Heaven today for sure...instead of rain, she has sunshine and rainbows! :) and Jesus of course! Brightest shinning light ever....no drab dreariness there!

I can't believe I've made it through the last 6 months. Its one of those things, that if I had known about it ahead of time or worried seriously about it, I would have thought it would be impossible to live without my little girl. However, when we are weak, HE is strong. HE has shown that strength and has kept me going in ways that I wouldn't have thought possible. HE has given me reason to live and not only survive but try to thrive for HIM.

Many things are coming from my daughter's legacy. With her life, which is now apart of my story, I need to be willing to share it. I hope that lives are changed and people are pointed towards our true source of strengh, because of her.
Tomorrow, marks the 1st GAME Day for our UPWARD BASKETBALL league. As the league director, I can't ask people to do something that I am not willing to do myself.
Therefore, 1st game of the season = me as the half time speaker. A huge part of our Upward Basketball ministry is to have half time speakers that share a story or devotion with our families who are there to watch. This is always the hardest role to fill (though we are having a rough go finding refs this year too eek!), as it's so difficult to talk in front of a crowd of people in general - but to share something personal and be vulnerable...that's even harder! I get that...so I have to do it, in order to ask that of others. And eventhough my story seems to be getting harder and harder to share...I somehow know that I am called to share. Last year I shared about my miscarriage and how out of Jaimie's life sprung Upward Basketball....this year, I have to share about my Kalyna and everything that is springing from her life. I am faced with the daunting task, today, to figure out the right way to put that and what to share. If you pray, please pray that I find the right words and that Kalyna's story and how God is working will touch the lives of our Upward Families and inspire them to find out more about our God of love. Please pray that I will have strength enough to make it through my half time talk. It's going to be a long 5 minutes...

Thanks for your love and prayer!
Looking forward to all that God is doing through Upward Basketball this year - we have such amazing coaches and volunteers.

So thankful that Jaimie and Kalyna's legacies continue to grow and inspire everyday and ultimately my prayer is that their stories will help point others to Jesus.
And always looking forward to that happy reunion one day in Heaven! :)
Until then....we have so many reasons to continue on till He calls us home.

Hope

Hope, what everyone is clinging to right now...

In light of all the recent events we are encountering, it seems like all we have left is hope. This world is so overcome by evil....we have to continue to cling to hope.
I've been searching my Bible over the past few days for verse on hope....

I hope that you take the time to read the promises from God of hope and are encouraged....it doesn't appear that this year is going to be an easy one....this world is going to get worse and worse till our Saviour comes back...but He is coming back and we have hope of a better future, a better future where we will see our believing loved ones/little ones again...we will see Jesus and all this horribleness from earth will be over. Until then, we have the strength this promise brings to endure things on earth and do whatever we can to point others to this hope as well.

HOPE

I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me.

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.”

The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly

for the salvation of the Lord.

~Lamentations 3:20-16~

 

Return to your fortress, you prisoners of hope; even now I announce that I will restore twice as much to you. ~Zechariah 9:12~

 

"Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Saviour and my God." ~Psalm 42:5~

 

Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honour depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.
~Psalm 62:5-8~

 

There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off.
~Proverbs 23:18~

 

Do you not know? Have you not heard?

The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not be faint.

~Isaiah 40:28-31~
 

"For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future." ~Jeremiah 29:11~

 

We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
~Romans 8:22-25~

 

For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.

~Romans 15:4~

 

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
~2 Corinthians 4:16-18~

 

People swear by someone greater than themselves, and the oath confirms what is said and puts an end to all argument. Because God wanted to make the unchanging nature of his purpose very clear to the heirs of what was promised, he confirmed it with an oath. God did this so that, by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope set before us may be greatly encouraged. We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where our forerunner, Jesus, has entered on our behalf. He has become a high priest forever, in the order of Melchizedek.

~Hebrews 6:16-20~

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. We boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.
~Romans 5:1-5~

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
~1 Corinthians 13:6-7~

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
~1 Corinthians 13:13~
 

To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.

~Colossians 1:27~

We remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.
~1 Thessalonians 1:3~

But since we belong to the day, let us be sober, putting on faith and love as a breastplate, and the hope of salvation as a helmet.
~1 Thessalonians 5:8~

...in the hope of eternal life, which God, who does not lie, promised before the beginning of time, ...
~Titus 1:2~

...while we wait for the blessed hope—the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good.
~Titus 2:13-14~

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.
~Hebrews 10:23~

Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.
~Hebrews 11:1~

2013

2013

Will this be a different year? Is it possible? The last was filled with so much pain and sorrow. Is it possible to have a better year? Or have we opened a door that won't close? It's true that the pain and sorrow will always be there. It doesn't go away, and it won't. It will never be easy again. No taking life for granted, no just doing what I want to do (although so hard not to be selfish)....no life is so much more than that. Just look at what happens in our world today when people live for themselves - children die needlessly, people go missing, bodies turn up, sex-trafficking of young girls, orphans, war, slaves, bullying, hangings, shootings, rapings, the list goes on. We live in a world over run by evil. It's all around us. You don't have to look far to see it. Lately it appears to be on our doorstep. How do we cope? How do we keep living? Why? Why should we? Why won't God just come now and take us home....

If He did, what happens to those who don't know Him? Yes right there is the point. Jesus died so that we might live with Him. That our sins might be forgiven and we would spend eternity with Him. He doesn't just want this for me though. No. He wants it for all of mankind. Everyone....no matter what they've done or who they are. And if He came now...there would be many left behind. And who's job is it to share Jesus' love that others might believe? Ours. While we are still on this earth, it is our job as Christians to share that love with others. Until we are called from this earth, our job is not done. And I know that there are people who God wants me to share His good news with, and I wouldn't want to miss that oppotunity to help someone see Jesus' love. I need to be constantly seeking God's strength, courage and wisdom purposely to know what He wants me to do. If I am engulfed in my own pain and sorrow I cannot do that. Yes the pain and sorrow does not go away, but I am able to live with it. And not just exist, but to continue to rely on God to be used for His purpose.

So 2013 - I don't know what the future of this year holds....but I know that God does. And whatever lies ahead, He will give me whatever I need to do whatever I am supposed to do.

As I was reading my Bible, looking for the perfect verse, suddenly I read Colossians 1:9-14

For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light. For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

 

This verse seems to sum up everything needed to survive/thrive in this year to come:

 

1. To continue to pray -  that the rest of this list might be a reality for me

(and also to continue to pray for friends, family, children I do not yet know.....for everyone)

2. To be filled with the knowledge of God's will

3. To have wisdom and understanding from the Spirit

4. To live a life worthy of the Lord

5. To bear good fruit - to share the Good News of Jesus with others that other might come to know Him

6. To grow in the knowledge of God

7. To be strengthened through His glorious might

8. To have endurance

9. To have patience

10. To give joyful thanks to God for the inheritance He has given me (Heaven with Jesus some day)

11. To overcome this dark world with His love, redemption and forgiveness of sins

 

And with God at my side, I can face this new year and what lies ahead.
Thank you Jesus for being here. For being present. For upholding me and refusing to let me go. For the strength You continue to give me to face each day. For the people you surround me with. For your everlasting, far-reaching, ever-extending undeniable love.

 

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow.

Because He lives, all fear is gone.

Because I know, I know, He holds the future.

And life is worth the living, just because He lives.

(Hymn-Because He Lives)

Just listened to a sermon which seemed to sum this up better than I can, definitely worth listening to:
http://semcmission.podbean.com/
Song of Redemption - December 23rd