A new season

It is definitely amazing how life takes over and there is no longer time to write very often. Then the thoughts just go round and round in my head till sometimes I think my head is going to pop! Here are a few musings from the past month...

Well we have finished week 4 of the new routine....of this new life that is called "the school years". And by the fact that I know it's only been four weeks, probably lets you know that it's been a long four weeks. It's definitely been a transition time for sure. I get up earlier now, so I get tired sooner...definitely a change I've noticed...my body does not like to get up in the morning...I used to think I was a morning person....apparently not so much....it just looked like I was compared to the rest of my family...
Anyways, Micah has been in school 4 weeks and is doing well! He comes home singing French songs and saying random French words that I know I haven't taught him. It really looks like they have a great program for JK/SK -very effective in learning French for sure! I figured that Micah would do well with that...he seems to really enjoy learning and things stick easily for him (definitely gets that from his father!). He has had some issues with the toilet at school though. It mortifies me, but there really isn't anything I can do about it. It seems that he gets so engaged at school and focused on something that he must block everything out and then has accidents. It's so terribly embarrassing to me. I don't think he really finds it a big deal though....he still talks about friends he plays with, so it doesn't seem to affect his socialness I think/I hope. He is blessed with a really great teacher this year who is so kind and understanding and helps him clean himself up every time...and hasn't banned him from coming yet either so that is great too. It hasn't been a lot (too much for me to handle) but really there have been maybe 4 days where he's had accidents...so I guess that's not too bad out of 4 weeks. Just one of those things I guess...(sorry for the total honesty here...)

On a more positive note, our dear little A, trained in 2 weeks and hasn't had an accident since. :) So whoever said girls were easier...or that second kids are easier...definitely has a point.

A also started preschool and gymnastics. Preschool is proving to be a bit of a challenge for A as she has a lot of random impulses and she needs to be taught what is appropriate behaviour for preschool and what isn't....(dumping sand on another child's head...isn't.) But she is starting to get it. She will even sit with the class 2 out of the 3 times they have sit down time. She loves doing the craft! And she is proud of herself every time she shares with a friend and doesn't put playdough in her mouth...that is a huge accomplishment for her. She goes two mornings a week and I think she improves every time she goes.  She is also enjoying her gymnastics...lots of swinging on bars, jumping, bouncing, somersaults...she enjoys it all. It requires a lot of self-control on her part to stay with her group and coach instead of running to other equipment around the gym. She is figuring it out though and doing better every time.  I'm so proud of her.

Well despite all the craziness, it is a new and exciting era. I'm so excited for all the things that both kids are learning! They are growing and learning and changing everyday. It's very thrilling to see.

I'm thankful for this season we are in, even if I have to drink 4 cups of coffee every day...just to keep up. I just need to figure out a little more balance for myself...figuring out where in the day to carve out my devotion time and prayer time...that is definitely needed and so important and can't be overlooked despite the busyness.
Just this past Friday, A and I had a quiet day at home and I was able to find this verse that really spoke to me:

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord ’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” ~Lamentations 3:21-24~

 

Every day God's mercies are new. There is something new each day. I am so thankful for this. The days I mess up, over-react, flip out, lose it...etc. are gone with the passing day and each day God forgives me and encourages me and I can start over. I am ever so thankful for my Saviour's compassion, mercy, faithfulness, strength and love.



Micah turns 4

My little first-born. The one who made us parents for the first time. I don't think it was very long after he was born that we figured out that parenting was not going to be easy....heheehee.

But out he came, all 8 pounds 2 ounces. He was laid on my chest and I remember thinking, is it a boy or a girl? Albert checked and sure enough it was a boy. A very cute little boy.

Now here we are 4 years later and he will be off to school come September! That seems pretty crazy, although I'm so excited for him to go to school. I think/hope that he will really enjoy it. I hope that he will enjoy the added challenge of learning French. My parents gave me the gift of learning another language while I was growing up and I really want to pass that gift onto my children too. Micah will be the first to head off to school to learn French and experience all that school has to offer. I won't continue on to defend my choice of school...I know that there are so many opinions out there on what type of school kids should go to (public school, private school, Christian school, homeschool). I personally believe that we need all these different types of schools as all kids are different and what works for one child, doesn't necessarily work for another. Every parent's job is to decide which form of school they feel is best suited for their child. There is no need to judge each other on which school we use, but support each other in our decisions....(my opinion anyway :) I know that in sending my kids to public school that it is my job and responsibility to know what is going on at school, to be in constant communication with the teachers and to talk to my children about what God says is right and what behaviours/words/actions they see at school might not be what God wants for them. To have that open discussion with my kids about how to be responsible, trustworthy kids. About how God loves them so much and loves their teachers and all the kids at school. They need to know that since God put their teacher in charge, that they need to respect their authority. Also, since God created all the kids in their class, that they need to treat them as loved children of God. We'll see how all this goes as the crazy adventure of school is just about to begin. Who knows how it will go...these are my thoughts as of now...but I'm willing to adapt/change should my children require it (the public school idea anyways). Enough about school though...

Micah was able to celebrate his birthday in a variety of ways...we had an afternoon swim and dinner at my dad's home as well as a trip to visit Thomas the train in St. Thomas. That was a fun experience for the kids. They seemed to have an awesome time and they made some good memories with their Opa and Memere Lise. That was a cool birthday trip for sure!
Micah also got to celebrate his birthday with a trip to the African Lion Safari with his Oma, Aunt, Uncle and Uncle's GF. It was a really great trip too...many wonderful memories made and exciting experiences were had.
Micah also got to celebrate his birthday with a trip to the farm - tractor rides with Poppers and playing ball with Aunt and Uncle...and then his whole birth day he spent lots of quality time with his Grannie. So many memories with people that he loves.
I love it. People are so valuable...building relationships, learning from and making memories with those that are important to Micah and who love him. These things hopefully he will remember for the rest of his life...through his memories and through photos. Remembering just how many people love him and some day when they are gone, he will have many fond memories to look back on.
Anyways, I'll leave you with my Micah's life verse...one he can now say all on his own!

So I will look to the Lord, I'll put my trust in God my Saviour. He will hear me.

~Micah 7:7~

Kalyna turns 2

Friday July 11, 2014 - My darling Kalyna turned two. I don't know if they keep track of age in Heaven...I'm not really sure how time works up there. But here on earth we keep time, so it feels ok to remember Kalyna's birthday and the age she would be.

I was so thankful on Friday to be able to spend some time alone at my daughter's grave. A caring friend watched the kids for the morning to allow me to spend some quiet time there.
It was a really crazy thing to go through all the stages of grief in a mere two hours. I went back to the day she was born. Holding her for the first time, my beautiful little baby girl - her dark curly hair, her overly red lips and her cute button nose. She was perfect in so many ways, except the way that counted. No breath came through her nose, no sound of crying from her lips. An unusual silence from a normally noisy birthing room. But she was there. There for me to hold, to kiss, to clean, to dress. I loved her instantly and a part of me was lost that day too. A part of my heart that will never heal until I get to hold her again.
As I moved through my thoughts, I thought about the legacy that she had left behind. Her being gone so soon, led to our adoption of A, which wouldn't have happened had she been here. Her legacy is that we can provide a loving home for A who needed one too. I wrote a letter to Kalyna telling her about her new sister. I can't wait for the two of them to meet one day.
I prayed for anger to go away, prayed for peace and for strength to be the best example I can be to my kids. I had felt very weighted and heavy as this day drew closer, and after spilling all my emotions and pain, I felt a renewed sense of peace and strength to continue on in this difficult life. To face it with some joy. To know that I'm not alone and that God is with me every day...that I need to make sure that I stay connected to Him - especially when I don't think I have the time -that's often when I need to make time.
I bought a little happy birthday candle and a 2 and put them by her grave to mark the significant day. Not much of a birthday celebration compared to what Micah is having soon...but hopefully it helped mark the significant day.
Lately I have been listening to a song by Third Day - one of their older songs, but a good one none the less...there is a line in the song that goes like this:
"It's alright, it's ok, I won't worry about tomorrow, for it brings me one more day closer than I was to you"
-I know that they are speaking about Jesus which I love....and I agree. It's taken on a bit of a double meaning lately, because it too means that I am a day closer to seeing my Kalyna again too (and my Jaimie). I am thankful for this promise.

And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death

or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” He said to me: “It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. To the thirsty I will give water without cost from the spring of the water of life. Those who are victorious will inherit all this, and I will be their God and they will be my children.

~Revelation 21:3-7~

Life

Well time just keeps passing on. Life continues on. We passed Father's day...a day where we celebrated Albert. I feel he likely didn't get enough celebrating for the great dad that he is, but he never complained because of course he is so awesome. I appreciate him so much. Something I've said before, but it never hurts to say it again. I am so thankful for my husband. He is committed to me and Micah and A. He gives of himself so much. He helps in the morning, goes to work, then comes home and plays with the kids and then helps with bedtimes. He is generally the bath-giver every night. What a blessing it is to have him in my life as my partner through life. Through the ups and downs he is there. It's really funny because we do work so well together. We are a great team. We recently had a Saturday to "ourselves" thanks to my mom who watched the kids. We had a booth at Kid's Fun Fest to promote Upward Basketball ....such a great day. I think we saw over 300 kids to whom we gave Upward Basketball info....so it will be interesting to see if some of them join us for this upcoming season. We were quite hot and worn after that, so we went to see our very first 3D movie! Crazy. It was so fun! Then we had a nice dinner out at East Side Marios....which was so yummy! :) It was an enjoyable day, just enjoying each other.

Recently as well, we hit June 19 - A's "gotcha" day! The anniversary of when A came to stay with us! One year ago a blond haired, blue eyed little girl was dropped off and slowly began to weave her way into our family and our hearts. She is such a cherished part of our family now. It took a lot of prayers and a lot of patience but I think we won her over. :) I think she has bonded with us and confidently knows that we are her family. I write this as I watch her and Micah climb all over Albert with big smiles and laughter. I've decided that a good word to describe her is vivacious. One year makes so much of a difference. I feel like I've learned so much over the year, and then sometimes I feel like I haven't learned anything. Regardless...our lives are richer and full of more joy than they were a year ago. We are a family of 4 on earth, navigating through this adventure and journey called life.

We are looking forward to a summer of daytrips and hopefully no drama or big changes. Just enjoying our family of four and making some memories together. :)

Thanks for reading.

Nehemiah said, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.”
~Nehemiah 8:10~

 

Dedication Day

A day I had been waiting for, for a long time. Dedication Day.
I tried to figure out why this was so important to me. I have already given my children to God. I know that they are His first and that He has entrusted them to me. But I think I wanted to follow in this step because it's just so meaningful to declare that we will raise our children to hopefully one day believe in Jesus and trust Him and follow Him wholeheartedly and that the church will help us do that as well. We are so thankful for our wonderful church family. They are truly so supportive and loving and beautiful. I am so thankful to be raising my kids in our church. That they are part of an extended "family" that will love them and show them Jesus through their actions.
 I think in part, I also wanted this dedication because I wanted a celebration. We've had heartache and people have shared in our heartbreak...I think I wanted to share my joy. I wanted to focus on what I do have and celebrate what I have, and not lament over what I don't have or feel like I should have. (This stems from a recent breakdown of mine a week or so ago-however, I am not going to wallow back there but to stand up against that depression and find joy in my Saviour and in my family.)

It was a really great day. All of our immediate family came out to the church service. I know that they will help us raise our children to come to know the Lord too. I can feel their support and their love. I'm so thankful for our family support system. They have accepted A into our family with unconditional love. It's so beautiful. Our family just brings me to tears the way they have really stepped up to help us shoulder the weight of being parents. They are all excellent grandparents and aunts and uncles...our kids are so blessed to have each of them in their lives. They each bring their own unique gifts to better the lives of my kids.
A's previous foster mom and her family came to the church service as well and her other foster family came to the bbq too. A has been so loved and so supported and so prayed for. I love how those that know A continue to want to be a part of her life. She is so special to so many people. I hope that keeping these connections will be a blessing to her as she grows. 

The day just made my heart sing. Celebrating our son and daughter. Micah, our handsome, smart, little man. He continues to amaze me by his ability to learn, care and love. He is just awesome. A, our beautiful, sweet, tender-hearted, spunky, fun-loving, yet tenacious, resilient and stubborn daughter. She has brought so much joy to our family. There was a time where it was hard to think that it was joy, there was so much confusion and anger...probably on both sides, but God has been here all along and had her in His plan and us in His plan. Together we are all better because we have each other.

I love my little daughter. I can't wait to see how she continues to grow and develop. She is amazing.
I love my son too. I look forward to watching him continue to grow and develop and start school this year!
Thank you dear Heavenly Father for these beautiful children you've given us. Thank you for your all powerful strength that you've given to us. Thank you for hearing our prayers.

Here is the verse I shared with the church. So important to know that it was only by God's strength that we were able to bring A into our lives. He carried us...and continues to carry us. In our strength we fail, but with God's strength - well His strength creates miracles.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Official

Well...we got the phone call today! (well yesterday now, by the time I get this posted!) Today our adoption worker called to say that A is officially ours today! The judge signed the papers and approved the adoption! DONE.
Wow. This journey we began back in August of 2012....calling and then waiting for an info session for a couple of months, 9 weeks of PRIDE training, weeks of homestudy and then finally being open, and the waiting....and then we met A. It's a rollercoaster ride to say the least, but it's been almost 10 months now that she has been here and we are so glad that she is. Now she is officially part of the family, even though she already was one of the family. We are so thankful and grateful to God that our adoption is complete with her. It's very much a blessing. No more visits from our worker anymore (although she was a wonderful woman)!

After the phone call we called Albert to let him know and then we had a dancing/jumping party. A loves to jump! Micah took some pictures and then we took some more pictures! We also bought some cupcake mix at the store and made cupcakes to celebrate, A loves to bake as well! It is a really great day!

The feeling of her adoption being complete is like no other. I am so happy....I guess I didn't realize there was stress over this, but I feel peace. Feel joy. Feel elation. Feel thankfulness. It's just a wonderful feeling and only increases my love for A, knowing that she is ours completely. What a great feeling.

That isn't to say that there won't be challenges along the way. We've come to realize that having some openness in our adoption would benefit A....but that is for another post. Right now, I am simply going to bask in the wonderfulness that she is officially ours! :)

I'll leave you with these verses:

Take delight in the Lord,

and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your way to the Lord;

trust in him and he will do this:

He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn,

your vindication like the noonday sun.

~Psalm 37:4-6~

Freeze

If I could freeze a day, today would probably be one of those days.
It's rare that we have a good day when we are home all day, but today was one of those days when everyone was in just the right mood to all get along.
It was so nice.
We had a leisurely morning, with both Albert and I getting a little time to ourselves, we had fun playing with the kids and lunch was yummy too. We had some awesome friends come over for coffee and had a wonderful visit with them. We had some more fun outside (even though it was terribly cold) after that with the kids and then we had bbq hamburgers for supper. Supper was followed up by some more good playtime with the kids and then a getting ready for bed dance party to Toby Mac and Grits. It was just a really great day- I know it doesn't seem like we did anything special, but it was incredibly special to me. There were no extreme melt-downs, lose your cool moments or time outs. It made me smile ...smile big. Today we gelled and felt truly like a family. Big smiley face :)

Thanks for letting me share my joy.

*                                      *                                          *

Read these verses this morning. This promise certainly set the tone for the day.

 

I look up to the mountains—does my help come from there?

My help comes from the lord,who made heaven and earth!

He will not let you stumble; the one who watches over you will not slumber.

Indeed, he who watches over Israel never slumbers or sleeps.

The lord himself watches over you!

The lord stands beside you as your protective shade.

The sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon at night.

The lord keeps you from all harm and watches over your life.

The lord keeps watch over you as you come and go, both now and forever.

~Psalm 121~